Today was the last scheduled OB visit before our due date. We know Emily won't be late. Because of my wife's "advanced" maternal age, she'll be 42 on August 1st. they won't let the pregnancy go past July 10th. I tried to explain to the doctor that my wife has the body of a twenty year old. While the doctor didn't disagree she did point out that my wife had a 41 year old placenta. I told the doctor "No, it was a brand new placenta, we just made it!" It's not like you make a bunch of them when when you're born and put 'em on ice till you need them.
The visit today included a "non-stress test." That's where mom gets hooked up to a monitor and they wait for the baby to move and then measure the baby's heart rate before, during and after the movement. They need two movements for an accurate measurement. Emily wasn't cooperating with movement number two so the nurse pulled out her "baby taser" and gave mom's belly a buzz. That got a reaction! Emily was jumping off the chart. Why, oh why does the medical establishment think scaring the hell out of a fetus is a good idea is beyond me. If the baby taser ever shows up again it won't be used on Emily. Everyone was fine and Emily calmed down after about an hour.